Tania

As months pass, I am finally getting comfortable with the idea of living in middle class suburbia. I have to say that it has not been without its challenges in fact one polite woman asked me very indirectly if all my children had the same father (WTF?). After I bought my house I told my Mom that I was going to put a huge sign on my front lawn that said “Thanks to all my baby daddies, for making my dreams come true” My Mom gave me the “Too far” look and we laughed it off.

Men In Blue

Regardless, it has been difficult to say the least. I have had more police officers show up at my house than I can ever remember and trust me, when the cops show up at your house for a “domestic involving children” all the neighbors come out to play. The reality was my kids were acting like gong shows and running around the yard screaming at 11:00 PM at night. The last call you want to get when you are away is that the police are all over the place and there is about 30 people watching it unfold. So true to my word, when I got home I marched all my kids next door to apologize to the neighbors for giving them a scare. I think they were a little caught off guard but they hugged them and thanked me for bringing them over.

Not Again

A couple weeks later, another knock on the door and another police officer. I immediately got pissed off and thought now what? I am not listening to any crazy death metal music, my kids are in bed and I don’t exactly feel like having the neighbors out in their housecoats on yet another Sunday. I answered the door a crack (my dogs don’t exactly like uniforms) and this kind man in a uniform said, “I was just driving by and noticed your garage door was open and its starting to rain pretty heavily.” I almost fell over as I thanked him stopping by. Interesting, I thought, very interesting. Just stopped by to help me out with my absent mindedness. Okay, cool!

Perfect Yards

And the final kick in the ass? I hated watching all the groves of people working on their well manicured lawns every day. I always thought, why not enjoy your life instead of pretending to look perfect. Anyways, my polite neighbor stopped by again and said that she wanted me to know that her husband was a little concerned about me and had been going out to do yard work to ensure that I was doing okay and he offered to help me with mine, not because I live in weeds, but because I had so much on my plate. Thanks a lot God, now I had to apologize for being a judgmental jerk. Ugghhh!

Learning The Ropes

In any respect, I did apologize and I did tell them that I also don’t need the judgments about my kids or how we lived our life. We had a great conversation about life, experiences, and common interests. The man (of course I forget his name) told me that just like your family, you can’t choose your neighbors but they are the people you will see more than most of your own family. So essentially your neighbors will become like your family and then he looked at me and said, “We couldn’t ask for a better family to live next door and believe it or not we might not look like where you come from, but we also have our own codes to follow.” I almost fell of his stoop. I have so much to learn in this lifetime. But I draw the line at power walking in a yoga suit, with a face full of make-up!